Aldi girl, yer know av got t'see yer once more
My Aldi girl, a'll bi waitin for yer by the front door my Aldi girl
Aldi girl, my Aldi girl, Aldi girl, my Aldi Girl

Break

Aldi girl a can hardly wait 'til 6 er clock
Mi Aldi girl, oh in yer Audrey Hepburn Oxfam frock my Aldi girl
Aldi girl, my Aldi girl
Aldi girl, Aldi girl, my Aldi girl

Oh but yer didn't come in today
Oh they tell mi that you've moved away

Orange, yellow and blue
Aldi girl yer know am in love with you
Yeah orange, yellow and blue
Aldi girl a don't know what t'do
Orange, yellow and blue
Aldi girl am still in love with you

Last night I traced the shadow of your face
On the pillow when you were fast on
And tomorrow when you're gone and I am all alone
Am gonna carve that sillouette to stone

Am gonna take that statuette out into the garden
Am gonna sit an stare at it all night long
Honey with an an hard on, in the garden

Cos yer know sometimes a feel that just I was not meant to live
No, I wasn’t meant to live

Well a fell into a coma on the beanbag in the corner
Till yer fatha wok us up at 6 o'clock
And the carpet by the stereo was sodden an he'd trodden in it
Suddenly a realised what ad done
A said, oh a week bladder's not as bad as a lad with an hard on
At which point he threw me out into the garden
Into the garden

Cos yer know sometimes a feel that I just was not meant to live
No, a wasn’t meant to live

[whistling]

Well mi auntie kem at playtime with mi birthday card
A took it though a know a shud've turned an walked away
Cos mi mother doesn’t talk to her
She has nothing t'do with her
Her sisters norra sister anymore
Oh a berried that card in the garden
Ashes to ashes, asbestos to asbestos dust
Dogshit an rust

Cos yer know sometimes a feel that a just was not meant to live
No, a was not meant to live, to live...

What am wonderin was can a come round yours for tea?
A know he'll bi out, it'll just be you an me
Wi can get a pizza an watch sum shit TV
Oh you can bi Twiggy a will bi Julie Christie
Wi can go to the bathroom, re-enact our favourite songs
Like "Tell Laura I Love Her" and put the windows through
Cos tonight I just need someone else's love
Love, love, love, someone else's love

What am wonderin was can a come round later on?
A know he'll bi out, just ring us when he's gone
Oh we can get a pizza an just watch whatever's on
You can bi Shannon an I will be Lonnie Donegan
Wi can go to the bedroom and re-enact our best love lines
Like "I'm a walking in the rain" and drink each other's piss
Cos tonight I just need someone else's kiss
Kiss, kiss, someone else's kiss
Kiss, kiss, someone else's...

She works in the Harbour Bar
The Scarborough Harbour Bar
Yeah she works in the Harbour Bar
The Scarborough Harbour Bar
And yer know she's never bin far
No she's never bin far
Well she comes in every morning in her knickerbocker glory
When a get in at eight er clock she has it waitin for me
A milky coffee, a milky coffee

And yer know what?
She's got the radio on
She's got the radio on - Sounds Of The Sixties
Radio on, radio on - it mighnt av bin Ed Stewart actually
Radio on - a man's written in from Liverpool
Radio on - he's lookin for his long lost love
Radio on - he's not sin her since 1963
He's still waitin for her t'come home for her tea

But she's gone, gone, gone
And he just can't get it into his head

Yer know well she's gone, gone, gone
But he just can't get it into his head
Into his fat head, into his fat head

Oh yeah

Well she works in the Harbour Bar
The Scarborough Harbour Bar
Yeah she works in the Harbour Bar
Scarborough Harbour Bar

Well she works all through the winter
She works all through the winter
She's never bin far
Who the f*** is Captain Cook
A said who the f****n hell is Captain Cook
She's gotta shake down the whale bones
Yeah she's gotta shake down the bones

It's hard bein a woman when yer live in Scarborough

Oh Urina, yer in my dreams
A wanna pick you up an rinse yer t-shirt clean
An does it really matter if yer only fifteen Urina

Oh yeah Urina, bulimia queen
I've brought you pop an crisps from the vending machine
A won't pretend t'know that a know where yer've been
Urina la la lo
Urina la la la lo
Yer know that I
Oh yer know a love yer

Oh yeah Urina yer in my dreams
A wanna pick you up an rinse yer t-shirt clean
An does it really matter if yer only fifteen Urina?

Oh yeah Urina drank toilet cleaner
Three days after a'd last seen her
She's gone t'where the bile is greener
Urina la la lo
Urina la la la lo
Yer know, yer know a love yer
Yer know a love yer

Well if I ever tire of lovin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of holdin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of wantin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of touchin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
It's 1921 a policeman's in his van
A policeman and baton and he's gonna take me home

Well am in pain on Royston Lane
Lieing in a three foot ditch
Av gotta bruise across mi back bigger than a football pitch

If I ever tire of lovin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of wantin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of kissin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of touchin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge

It's 1981 Barnsley to Royston
Av missed the last bus home an am gunna av t'walk

Well am in pain on Royston Lane
A gotta stoning at the roundabout
A policeman stopped t'pick me up
It was kind of him t'help me out
(they're not all bastards yer know)

Well if I ever tire of lovin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of wantin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of kissin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge
An if I ever tire of touchin you then it's the Woolley Edge Baton Charge

It's 1921 a policeman's in his van
With his baton and his van an he's gonna take me home

Well am in pain on Royston Lane
Am lieing in a three foot ditch
Oh av got a bruise across mi back an it's bigger than a football pitch

Am sat on yer doorstep an am not goin anywhere
Av got mi wire clippers an am gunna climb up you stairs
Well a, a know where you are sleepin an a know you sleep alone
S'don't bother tranna get help cos av cut off yer phone

Am needin you now, am needin you now
Am wantin you now an am gonna get you somehow

An all that chicken wire that surrounds you as you sleep
Am gonna cut a hole, yes am gonna cut a hole
Am gonna crawl into yer dreams an a'll find out where yer go
Am gonna crawl into yer dreams and i'll find out if yer know

Am needin you now, am needin you now
Am wantin you now an am gonna get yer somehow

Two lovers an er Mini
On er sunny April afternoon
Discussin ways
In which they can waste the day
She suggests the bedroom
He suggests the park

Two lovers an er Mini
An they're drivin down the motorway
Two lovers an er Mini
An they're crashin on their weddin day
They were gonna t'Centre Parcs
But no, no, no
Now they're gonna Arrow Park

The orange glow of the April sun
Signifies the day is dyin, night has just begun

There goes the sun
There goes the sun
There goes the sun
There goes the sun
There goes the sun, sun, sun, sun, sun

Well a love love love my Royston
When a leave well a ain't turnin back
Yes a love love love my Royston
When a leave it's a one-way track

Yeah a know is a've just gotta go away quite soon
Yeah a love love love my Royston
But there comes a time when yer just gotta say goodbye
Yes a love love love my Royston
Believe me there won't bi no tears in my eyes

All a know is that a've just got t'go away soon
Cos my mother she keeps memories like eggs in the fridge
My father's built a mountain an he's up on the ridge
Me, a keep memories thrown like stones off a bridge
An a've got t'get some lovin soon
A've got t'get mi a lovin spoonful soon

Well a love love love my Royston
Do yer know when when a leave a won't look back
Yes a love love love my Royston
When a leave later oh it's a one-way track

All a know is baby a've got t'go away soon

Well the girl thar ar was dreamin of
Upped an left mi dreams leavin mi lonely
If only, well the six er clock alarm'd never ring
Well am ripped at the seams
An well it seems a'll never find another you
Oh yer know it's true
A guess a'll av t'sell mi smile an hang around the toilets for a while

Because shit weather we're havin
Oh a feel like givin in
Oh yer know a feel like, a feel like givin in

Oh yeah, oh shit weather we're avin
Oh an a feel like givin in
Oh yer know a feel like, a feel like givin in

Shit weather we're avin
Oh an a feel like givin in
A feel like, a feel like givin in
Oh yeah

Oh well yer know shit weather we're avin
Oh an a feel like, a feel like
Oh an a feel like, a feel like givin in

Oh because
Well the girl that ar was dreamin of
Upped an left mi dreams leavin mi lonely
If only, well the six o'clock alarm'd never ring
Oh well am ripped at the seams
An well it seems a'll never never gonna find another you
Oh yer know it's true
A guess a'll av t'sell mi smile an hang around the toilet for a while

Because shit weather we're avin an a feel like givin in
Oh yer know a feel like, a feel like givin in
Shit weather we're avin an a feel like givin in
A feel like, a feel like, a feel like givin in

Take my hand and we'll go
We'll go to a special land
We'll play in the sandpit for a bit

Well you can play with my Tonka Toy
You're a girl and I'm a boy
You're a girl and I'm a boy

Well we can watch the flames from
Monckton Coking Plant
And yer know, yer know that a'll give yer
Yeah a'll give yer what yer want

Yeah we can go down by the garages
And we'll play our special games
And a'll touch you in those places
That I don't know the names of

And does this mean that we're in love?
Does this mean that we're in love?
Does this mean that we're in love?

Yeah take my hand
And we can go to a magic land
We can play in the sandpit for a bit
You can play with my Tonka Toy

You're a girl and I'm a boy
You're a girl and I'm a boy

Well we can all watch the flames from
Monckton Coking Plant
And yer know, yer know that a'll give yer
Well a'll give yer what yer want

Well we can go down by the garages
And we can play our special games
And a will touch you in those places
That ar don't know the names of

And does this mean that we're in love?
Does this mean that we're in love?
Does this mean that we're in love?

Oh yes a will ball you by the ball wall
Yes a'll ball you by the ball wall
Yes a'll ball you by the ball wall
Yes a'll ball you by the ball wall